Gray cubicle walls are a form of mind control. Have you ever caught yourself saying really funny stuff or having great ideas only to come into work the next morning completely unable to remember any of it? Well part of it may have been that you were hammered last night. The other part is that you’re now surrounded by gray stain resistant wall-carpet which has been scientifically designed to remove all creative or independent thought. Even the little posters or signs you put up to remind you that there IS life outside those walls has little impact. You’re in it for the long haul, buddy.
Of course there are a lot of positives – a steady paycheck, benefits, maybe even some cute Jenna Fischer clone to have a witty repartee with. Unfortunately the Jenna Fischer clone is completely unrealistic. Even if there is one she never stays long.
Cut the Cubicle Umbilical Cord: The Seven Traits of the Free Man
#1 by belmont yo on September 10, 2009 - 9:11 am
Even the little posters or signs you put up…
I have an alien fetus in a jar, a beanie baby of the apocolypse and several boxes of freeze dried dreams in my cube… and yeah. You’re right, it doesn’t help.
/hay gais! whats goin on over here?
#2 by Loki on September 10, 2009 - 9:49 am
Oh you know – just sittin at the table in the corner. Throwing spitballs and listening to the Cure.
#3 by shenanigans on September 10, 2009 - 1:39 pm
I don’t even get walls. I have a boomerang shaped desk facing away from everyone. I wish I had cube walls. Then I could eat my Andy Kapp Hot Fries in peace.
#4 by Donk on September 10, 2009 - 1:44 pm
Shen’s going to gain the corporate 15. Ice Cream vending machines should be outlawed due to their impossible temptation against willpower.
#5 by Floozy on September 10, 2009 - 5:32 pm
Shen, they have faced your desk that way so they can see what’s on your computer screen. It’s a test of corporate dronism. One flash of Facebook and you’re GONE.
#6 by shenanigans on September 11, 2009 - 2:08 am
I did good today. I only had one hot chocolate, 1/2 a bag of skittles, potato chips, and some trail mix. Fucking vending machines.
#7 by cbob on September 11, 2009 - 8:17 am
You just have to learn to get really quick with the ALT-TAB.
#8 by Donk on September 11, 2009 - 10:02 am
ALT+TAB is overrated.
http://www.thinkgeek.com/computing/accessories/76ed/
#9 by Street on October 5, 2009 - 4:14 pm
Ctrl+Alt+down arrow is much more fun.
#10 by Donk on October 6, 2009 - 10:19 am
Street. That’s awesome.
#11 by Street on October 9, 2009 - 1:20 pm
I still say the best way to banish cubicle-cryonic-torpor is by filling the water cooler with vodka. Tito’s Handmade Vodka, if you can get it.